One Foot Out The Door

My oldest son is 17. He is a senior in high school. I never see him. He leaves in the morning to lift weights with the football team before school, then goes to school. By the time he gets home from school I'm walking out the door to take younger siblings to dance and football practice. When I get back home, he's gone to football practice of his own. When he gets home, I'm going to bed so I can get up at five a.m. and take my daughter to dance. We do get a moment in the morning when I mix up his morning breakfast and again at night when we say good night and end the day with a prayer of thanks.

I'm a lucky mother because every day for the last several years my son has said to me: "I'll tell you about my day." He then proceeds to give me every and any detail of his day. (I know, I'm lucky). I know where he ate for lunch, and with who. I know which teachers are driving him nuts and what he's got to do for the next day. They say knowledge is power and boy howdy is that true when you've got teenagers.

So when this new school year brought us dueling schedules, I suddenly noticed a void in my life. My knowledge and power were out the window and my boy was flying solo. I hated my lack of control. He had one foot out the door and I almost wished he'd just walk out and shut the door behind him. It was too hard having him here, but never seeing him and not being able to help.

Then it hit me. This is what I'd been working towards his whole 17 years of life. I'd been teaching him how to use his wings these many years so that when the time came, he could fly solo successfully. And you know what? He's flying beautifully!

Instead of hating the fact that we never have quality time together. I'm negotiating time. I'll stay up later than I'd like so I can hear his "I'll tell you about my day" stories. We'll make a quick trip to a nearby gas station for an ice-cream cone after school before we go our separate ways. We even planned a trip to see his favorite team the Denver Broncos play in a Monday Night Football game. We had a blast and made memories that will last long after he's gone off to college.

I also realized that your kids will always be your kids. Lucky for me, it will never end. Families are forever and I look forward to hearing stories about my kids' days, and my grand kids' days, and so on and so on for all eternity.